Section 1: Black Bat Irresponsibility
Clause.
1 – A: Black Bat is not responsible
for its own actions.
1 – B: You are responsible for the
actions of Black Bat.
Section 2: (When applicable) clause
2 – A: All paragraphs contain “(when
applicable)”.
2 – B: “(When applicable)
means, if Black Bat deems appropriate.
Section 3: The truth in Black Bat clause.
3 – A: Black Bat reserves the right
to lie.
3 – B: Black Bat reserves the right
to contradict itself.
3 – C: Black Bat reserves the right
to give misleading information.
Section 4: The “you xxxx
it you buy it” clause.
4 – A: You break it you buy it.
4 – B: You walk into the same room
as it you buy it.
4 – C: You look at it you buy it.
4 – D: You are aware of its existence
you buy it.
Section 5: The false identity/address,
ect. Clause.
5 – A: Black Bat and its employees
reserve the right to assume false names.
5 – B: Black Bat and its employees
reserve the right to assume false addresses, villages, towns, cities, shanty towns, hotels, motels, flats, apartments and/or
countries.
5 – C: Black Bat and its employees
reserve the right to assume false genders, fingerprints, ethnic minorities, DNA, families, history, education, occupation
and/or religion.
5 – D: Section: 5 – C is not
an excuse for Owen Lowe, Charles Bottcher and other others to gain a gender.
Section 6: The “no-Owens/Charleses”
clause.
6 – A: All Owens/Charleses may not
be employed by Black Bat.
6 – B: All Owens/Charleses may not
live.
6 – C: Owen refers to Owen Lowe, Charles
Bottcher and other people/others that Black Bat chooses.
Section 7: The paying of fines clause.
7 – A: Any violation of any clause
in this book will result in heavy fines.
7 – B: Refer to section 2, Paragraphs
A-B.
7 – C: Black Bat reserves the right
to change amount that the finee gets fined at any time without any notification or a good reason.
7 – D: It would be good to refer
to Section 18, Paragraphs A-C.
Section 8: The Kreeton Korp loophole clause.
8 – A: Black Bat is not responsible
for the actions of Kreeton Korp.
8 – B: Kreeton Korp is not responsible
for its own actions.
8 – C: You are responsible for the
actions of Kreeton Korp.
Section 9: The “prove them wrong”
clause.
9 – A: No it isn’t.
9 – B: Yes it is.
9 – C: No it/he/she doesn’t.
9 – D: Yes it/he/she does.
9 – E: No you don’t.
9 – F: Yes we do.
9 – I: Refer Section 10.
9 – J: Despite the fact that Section
11, just refers to Section 9, it is not a filler.
Section 10: The “a wizard did it”
clause.
10 – A: If the action of Black Bat
or any of its subsidiaries cannot be explained by anything, a wizard did it.
10 – B: It doesn’t mater how,
why, when, or where the wizard did it, a wizard did it.
10 – C: Despite the scenario, a
wizard did it.
1. A customer of Black Bat complains that
he lost $100 at Black Bat offices.
2. He goes to Black Bat offices and disappears
because…
3. An extremely high level wizard decides
to use a small scale time travel spell to travel two minutes into the future so he won’t have to wait for his microwaved
popcorn.
4. The magical backlash erases some of
the recent history, namely of that guy being born.
Section 11: The “prove us right”
clause.
11 – A: Refer to 9 – A.
11 – B: Refer to 9 – B.
11 – C: Refer to 9 – C.
11 – D: Refer to 9 – D.
11 – E: Refer to 9 – E.
11 – F: Refer to 9 – F.
11 – G: Refer to 9 – G.
11 – H: Refer to 9 – H.
11 – I: Refer to 9 – I.
11 – J: Refer to 9 – J.
Section 12: The “copy, write”
clause.
12 – A: Black Bat sees other copyright
as the right for Black Bat to copy the intellectual property of others.
12 – B: 12 – A is supported
by Black Bat island law and Black Bat court law.
Section 13: Teh inkomptant speelung clorse.
13 – A: Dispite hoi inkompetly speeled
ani of teh clorses in ids clorse bork ar speeled, eit dorsant matta.
13 – B: Fact the that, despite some
clauses not sense, may doesn’t matter it.
Section 14: The obtaining clause.
14 – A: Black Bat officials may
claim any property that belongs to you.
14 – B: Black Bat officials may
claim any property that does not belong to you.
Section 15: The interpretation clause.
15 – A: Paragraphs in this book
must be interpreted by a Black Bat official.
15 – B: Paragraphs in this must
not be interpreted by you or your attorney.
Section 16: The forging clause.
16 – A: Black Bat reserves the right
to forge signatures.
16 – B: Black Bat reserves the right
to forge signatures, poorly.
16 – C: Black Bat reserves the right
to sign people’s names with an X or any other letter or combination of letters in any alphabet.
Section 17: The Black Bat immunity clause.
17 – A: Black Bat and its employees
reserve the right to obtain diplomatic immunity regardless of race, country of birth, or species.
17 – B: Black Bat and its employees
reserve the right to create immunities such as: Genderoptic immunity, DNAoptic immunity or specioptic immunity.
Section 18: The clause changing clause.
18 – A: Black Bat reserves the right
to change, add or delete any clauses within the clause book, without notification or a good reason.
18 – B: Black Bat reserves the right
to change, add or delete any clauses within the clause book at any given time.
18 – C: If Black Bat chooses to
change, add or delete a clause within this clause book, they are not obligated to tell anyone, write it down, or have a good
reason.
Section 19: The Black Bat and law clause.
19 – A: Black Bat and its officials
are above the law.
Section 20: The peter did it
clause.
20 – A: If Section 10, Paragraphs
A – C, do not explain the actions of Black Bat, peter did it.
20 – B: In some cases, peter
may be the wizard who did it.
Section 21: The scapegoat clause.
21 – A: Black Bat officials reserve
the right to “elect” scapegoats.
21 – B: Black Bat reserves the right
to blame any problems on scapegoats.
Section 22: The grave-digging clause.
22 – A: Black Bat reserves the right
to dig up bodies for the purposes of science.
22 – B: Black Bat reserve the right
to dig up bodies for building chemical, biological, or carbon based weapons.
22 – C: Black Bat reserve the right
to dig up bodies for building houses, furniture, eating utensils, writing implements and/or robots.
22 – D: Black Bat reserves the right
to dig up bodies for recreational purposes.
22 – E: Black Bat reserves the right
to dig up bodies for no particular reason.
Section 23: The super-ultra fine print
section.
23 – A: Black Bat reserves the right
to use super-ultra fine print. I.E no refunds.
23 – B: All super-ultra fine print
is to be interpreted by Black Bat officials and not you or your attorney.
23 – C: Black Bat reserves the right
to change super-ultra fine print at any given time, without telling anyone, writing it down or having a good reason.
Section 24: The cost for clauses clause.
24 – A: Before reading Section 24,
Paragraphs B-C, read all other sections.
24 – B: By reading any of the paragraphs
in this book, you agree to pay a certain amount of money, to Black Bat for each paragraph read.
24 – C: By reading any of the paragraphs
in this book you agree to read every other paragraph in this book.
Section 25: The clause effect clause.
25 – A: You do not need to have
made a deal with Black Bat for these clauses to take effect.
25 – B: You do not need to have
had any contact with Black Bat, or even be aware of Black Bat’s existence for these clauses to take effect.
Section 26: The enslavement clause.
26 – A: If Black Bat or its employees
wish to enslave anyone, the chosen person is now a slave and has no rights.
26 – B: If Black Bat or its employees
wish to enslave anyone they are not obligated to tell anyone, write it down, or have a good reason.
Section 27: The election clause.
27 – A: Black Bat reserves the right
to rig elections.
27 – B: Black Bat reserves the right
to take the place of any given leader.
Section 28: The debt clause.
28 – A: If Black Bat or its employees
decide that someone owes them money, that person must pay that amount on the given date.
28 – B: If Black Bat or its employees
decide that you owe someone money, or they owe you money, that amount must be payed on the given date.
Section 29: The oral interpretation clause.
29 - A:
Black Bat and its employees may interpret what you say as whatever they wish.
29 – B: Black Bat and its employees
may interpret what you don’t say as whatever they wish.
29 – C: What Black Bat and its employees
say is to be interpreted by a Black Bat official and not by anyone else.
Section 30: The Ow!!! that hurts
clause
30-A: A
Blackbat employee may interpret any expression of pain as yes or no
30-B: A Blackbat employee may interpret
any expression of pain as anything they want.
Section 31: The Peter isn't clause:
31-A: For the purposes of safety Peter does not
count as a Black Bat employee.
31-B: For the purposes of safety Peter cannot use the clauses.
Section 32: The Black Bat overruling clause.
32-A: The Black Bat clauses overrule any other clauses.
32-B: The Black Bat clauses overrule actual laws.
Section 33: The Black Bat ethnicity clause
33-A: Black Bat reserves the right to discriminate agianst/glorify
anybody on the basis of ethnicity, religion, gender, species, sexual prefrence, political prefrence, beliefs opinions, and/or
appearance.
33-B: Blackbat may discriminate against any person for
no good reason
33-C: Blackbat reserves the right to exterminate any ethnicity without
having to tell anyone, write it down, or have a good reason.
